My son will be a year old next month. I have loved each and every moment of it. From the newborn stage to the about to walk stage (which he is in now). I love nothing more than just watching him learn and explore. But please, please do not tell me I need a second child or that it is not fair that my son does not have a sibling. Do you even know my story?
It kills me when people say to us; “When is number 2?” “You need another one” “Its not fair to just have one child” “Don’t you want him to have a sibling?’ OF COURSE I DO! We struggled for 2 years trying to conceive. Finally finding out I have PCOS was heartbreaking. We never thought it was going to happen. I stopped going to baby showers and stopped going on social media for a long time. It was a very dark time for myself.
We finally had the financial backing to do IVF (in vitro fertilization). This procedure is not 100% for sure that you will get a baby out of it, but it was the only option we had. If you see my previous post, I have talked about our journey. I wont get into it here. Lets just say, to do IVF I had to take shots in my stomach for about 10 days, then once I conceived I had to take shots in my bum for almost the whole first trimester. There was even a moment where I broke then vile of Progesterone while I was out of town and had to leave at 5am from where I was to drive 3 hour to the doctors office on a Saturday just to get another bottle, which I almost was not able to get. Had I not gotten that medication, I may have lost my baby.
Now that he is almost one, we are ready for the 2nd child, but again, in order to do that, we have to go through IVF unless a miracle happens. That’s the short version of what the doctor told us last week. We do not have the means to do it again. Insurance does not cover what we need. We left the doctors office emotionally drained and feeling once again defeated.
Some people do not realize how their questions or statement effect the person they are asking. Does it make us less of a parent because our son may be an only child? What if we only wanted one? Is that your concern? I am going to be the one that has to tell my son that he was a miracle and mommy can’t have anymore babies, when he asks why he doesn’t have any brothers or sisters.
So please, when you see a couple with a child, take everything into consideration before asking why they do not have another one. I have accepted that we will most likely just have our son. He is such a perfect beautiful blessing.